I am developing a theory that many businesses have moved to a form of tokenism that is barely more than an excuse for us to give them money. Any concept that we will actually gain some benefit from it is incidental, and occasionally accidental. I have some examples that I'll try to,post shortly, but in the meantime - thanks to Peter Bray of Clear Blue Day, who documents Dell making yet another advance in its war on customers.
As a cathartic exercise, let me throw in my latest experience with Optus, from whom I get my cable TV, Broadband and Phone service, all of which are perfectly fine. So what's the beef?
Cellphone repairs. Beef, as in dead cow. Very dead.
The rest is long and only for those really interested in watching a large comnpany committing slow suicide.
It started last October when I, finally found a cellphone deal I could live with; didn't cost the earth, I could understand the offer. The Optus Prepaid contract lets me call my wife, also on prepaid, for nothing, for up to 300 mnutes a month. I can text my daughter in NZ and otherwise make it my mobile point of contact.
BONUS, because it uses a SIM card, I can buy a prepaid card in most other countries, except the US but that's another story, and have a local phone book and local account wherever I go.
So far, so excellent.
The a couple of months ago, while cursoring down the contact list, the phone dropped dead. I restarted it and it worked OK for a day or so, then dropped dead again. Then I couldn't even charge it up.
Magic Words - Under warranty. I deliver it to the Optus shop in Burwood Sydney. They are sympathetic. The take some details and carry it off for examination and repair.
"Any chance of a loaner?"
"Not right now, they're all out, but as soon as one come in, we'll let you know."
Mhmm.
Two weeks go by. No sign of a loaner, no sign of a call about my repair. I call them up myself.
"Yes, its here"
"Whe didn't you call me?"
"We did"
"What number did you call"
"0413 624 391"
Very Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooong Pause
"Go on, you tell me what's wrong with that"
"Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Its your cellphone?"
"Which one?"
"Ummmmm, this one?"
"Bingo! How in hell do you expect me to answer it?"
More fooling about, I go in, collect the phone.
"What's wrong?"
"Don't know, they never say, just that its been replaced"
Two days later, same problem. Replaced my ass.
Back to the shop. Check it in again. Earl, being smart, explains problem with calling a phone that they have in their hand to get me 5 miles away.
"Oh, right, we are supposed to ask if there's another number to call"
"OK, here's my wireline number" He writes it down for addition to the file.
"Any chance of a loaner"
"Sorry, they're all out, there's a growing list of people who want them"
DINGDINGDING! This should be telling us all something about the business. I wonder what it is?
10 days go by. No call. I phone last Sunday.
"Where is it?"
"Not here"
"Have you looked?"
"No point"
"GO AND DAMNED WELL LOOK"
Slightly smarmy "It isn't here. I can't get into the system, I'll get someone to call you Monday"
"What number are you going to call?"
"0413 624 391" More recrimminations and patient explanations about writing the damned number down in a place that someone might read it and use it.
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. I call again.
"Its me"
"Hello Earl"
"Where's my phone?"
You know what's coming next don't you?
"Its here, we called you, but there was no answer"
"What number did you call?"
"0413 624 391" Franz Kafka is alive and well and working for Optus
Replay the bit above, at several hundred decibels, lots of recrimminations and bad language. A light bulb goes on.
"When did you call me?"
"Ummm, the 14th"
"So that's LAST THURSDAY YES?!!!!"
"Yes"
"So why did Mr Smartass tell me on Sunday, after looking for it, that it wasn't there?"
Lots more fruitless yelling.
Tokenism, rampant, service absent.
Testing an idea about Adsense
And I thought my AAPT experience today was bad!!
http://tonygoodson.typepad.com/tonygoodson/2005/07/effing_aapt.html
Posted by: Tony Goodson | July 22, 2005 at 11:43 PM